Did I tell you my grandpa is in hospital? Pa as we call him effectionately is a pain in the arse, he used to live downstairs at out place when I was in highschool and college and he would come whistling up the stairs and call out to find my mom (the stairs where right by my room) at 8:30am on a SATURDAY!
He has had multiple heart attacks in the past and the docs have told us that if he has another heart attack he will die. He has angina a lot, and has been developing respiratory problems, he now has to have continuous oxygen, there is nothing they can do for him really, he has asbestosis from dealing with the stuff they used to put in as insultation in the old houses. My parents are going to Thailand for 6months, probably longer, I so don't want to have to deal with him dying while they are away. How selfish am I? but "don't go mom and dad!!!"
So with friends who are suicidal (more than one yes), pa sick, and me wishing so hard that I can get sick before I have to go back to work Thursday... things don't look so great. I dunno maybe I just need to have a good cry... that usually makes you feel better... doesn't it?
I keep praying desparately that I get sick so I don't have to go to work, I am tired of dealing with all of the shit, don't know if I can deal with their shit on top of mine. Guess I better go and eat more chocolate to hold of the funk that I am sliding into.
Hmmm putting it down here makes it not seem so bad, other people must have it worse, I give up really.

posted by BJ @   0 Comments