Thursday, January 26, 2006
Bleh
Okay so it wasn't all that bad, but I just can't cope with the shit that goes on in nursing. I had 6 patients, one of my patients was reasonably unwell, the decided to put a pleural chest drain in on the ward and do some biopsies. I was like..errr... are you sure you should be doing that here and no like in ICU or something? For anything that could possibly collapse this guys lung any more than it already was I would be thinking that some ICU monitoring where they could use a respirator if needs be would be a good idea. But nope.. so that took a good 2hrs out of my shift looking after him, getting things for the them as they did the chest drain. They also thought there was a possibility of this fella having tuberculosis.... mmm.. so we were all doing this with gown, masks and gloves on.
The precluder to this story is the fact this guy was brought up from emergency department with the STAFF members wearing masks, but not the patient cause the patient needed the oxygen, so they protected the staff members who were closest to him, problem with that is that he was being wheeled right through the hospital past other people who were not protected.
So he was taken down to CT with no mask as well today, cause he had to have Oxygen and it is ridiculous trying to get a nother mask on the top or underneath an oxygen mask.
So we did all the chest tube stuff and got it down and the evening supervisor decided that the patient would be better monitored on level 8 cardiac ward. So i dutifully packed him up and got an orderly after about an hours wait and took him down to level 8... well I put a mask on me and the guy who was taking him but again we just left him with the oxygen mask. I got him down there and handed him over, and what happens, but I get a lecture from the boss from level 8 about taking him down there with no mask on. Gah.. what does she fucking want from me? I responded with the fact the TB is not proven and it is very hard to put a mask on when he really needs the oxygen mask. She replies with.. well you should have thought about it and done it anyways. I am jack of her attitude by then and very tempted to tell her to fuck off. I cannot do anything about it now anyways, he is there! There was nothing else I could do. he is suspected Tb, which means he would have to cough or sneeze on someone to give them the bug anyways and he has a oxygen mask over his freakin face, so its not likely that anything is escaping anyways. FUCK.... so i am pissed and feeling guilty for the rest of shift over the bloody mask thing.
I still have 5 other patients to look after that i have been neglecting for the evening cause of this guy.. give me a freaking break.
I am quickly getting to the point where I need to quit nursing. I am angry or annoyed a lot of the time at work, patients come that we aren't expecting or that I haven't been told about and it gets me angry, procedures are happening and I aren't told or feel they are inappropriate on the ward and I get annoyed. Patients do stupid things, are rude, need pans... i get annoyed. Nursing Students ask questions, do things they aren't sposed to, need everything explained, I am getting more pissed.
Am finding it very difficult to just be civil, and that aint a good thing, especially in a service job like I have :I still don't know what i want.. but it needs to be something very different from what i am doing now. I don't like feeling stressed and worried all the time about whether I have given all my medications and done the right things at work. i don't like knowing that if I fuck something up it could mean someone dies because of me. Yes I understand that lots if not most jobs have this in some degree, but in nursing it is at the forefront of your thoughts all the time. I go home nearly every day and I wait for a phone call about whether I have given such and such a drug, whether I have fixed someones paperwork, whether I have given a patient a wash... whether I realised that someones IV medication was given at the wrong rate...
Or if I was in charge, that such and such a nurse fucked up and gave someone something they shouldn't have...
*sighs*
Oh well.. roll on holidays and Thailand.
Laters
Every day I sit here waiting
Everyday just seems so long
and now I've had enough of all the hating,
do we even care? its so unfair
Any day it'll all be over
Any day there's nothing new
and I'm just trying to find some hope to try and hold on to
and it starts again, it'll never end
I'm heavily broken, and I don't know what to do
Can't you see that I'm choking and I can't even move,
When there's nothing left to say, what can you do?
I'm heavily broken, and there's nothing I can do.
Almost given up on trying,
almost heading for the fall,
and now am I just screaming out I gotta keep on fighting
but then again it doesn't end
I'm heavily broken, and I don't know what to do
Can't you see that I'm choking and I can't even move,
well its hard for me to say, what can you do?
I'm heavily broken, and there's nothing I can do.
(Heavily broken, by the Veronicas)
Okay so it wasn't all that bad, but I just can't cope with the shit that goes on in nursing. I had 6 patients, one of my patients was reasonably unwell, the decided to put a pleural chest drain in on the ward and do some biopsies. I was like..errr... are you sure you should be doing that here and no like in ICU or something? For anything that could possibly collapse this guys lung any more than it already was I would be thinking that some ICU monitoring where they could use a respirator if needs be would be a good idea. But nope.. so that took a good 2hrs out of my shift looking after him, getting things for the them as they did the chest drain. They also thought there was a possibility of this fella having tuberculosis.... mmm.. so we were all doing this with gown, masks and gloves on.
The precluder to this story is the fact this guy was brought up from emergency department with the STAFF members wearing masks, but not the patient cause the patient needed the oxygen, so they protected the staff members who were closest to him, problem with that is that he was being wheeled right through the hospital past other people who were not protected.
So he was taken down to CT with no mask as well today, cause he had to have Oxygen and it is ridiculous trying to get a nother mask on the top or underneath an oxygen mask.
So we did all the chest tube stuff and got it down and the evening supervisor decided that the patient would be better monitored on level 8 cardiac ward. So i dutifully packed him up and got an orderly after about an hours wait and took him down to level 8... well I put a mask on me and the guy who was taking him but again we just left him with the oxygen mask. I got him down there and handed him over, and what happens, but I get a lecture from the boss from level 8 about taking him down there with no mask on. Gah.. what does she fucking want from me? I responded with the fact the TB is not proven and it is very hard to put a mask on when he really needs the oxygen mask. She replies with.. well you should have thought about it and done it anyways. I am jack of her attitude by then and very tempted to tell her to fuck off. I cannot do anything about it now anyways, he is there! There was nothing else I could do. he is suspected Tb, which means he would have to cough or sneeze on someone to give them the bug anyways and he has a oxygen mask over his freakin face, so its not likely that anything is escaping anyways. FUCK.... so i am pissed and feeling guilty for the rest of shift over the bloody mask thing.
I still have 5 other patients to look after that i have been neglecting for the evening cause of this guy.. give me a freaking break.
I am quickly getting to the point where I need to quit nursing. I am angry or annoyed a lot of the time at work, patients come that we aren't expecting or that I haven't been told about and it gets me angry, procedures are happening and I aren't told or feel they are inappropriate on the ward and I get annoyed. Patients do stupid things, are rude, need pans... i get annoyed. Nursing Students ask questions, do things they aren't sposed to, need everything explained, I am getting more pissed.
Am finding it very difficult to just be civil, and that aint a good thing, especially in a service job like I have :I still don't know what i want.. but it needs to be something very different from what i am doing now. I don't like feeling stressed and worried all the time about whether I have given all my medications and done the right things at work. i don't like knowing that if I fuck something up it could mean someone dies because of me. Yes I understand that lots if not most jobs have this in some degree, but in nursing it is at the forefront of your thoughts all the time. I go home nearly every day and I wait for a phone call about whether I have given such and such a drug, whether I have fixed someones paperwork, whether I have given a patient a wash... whether I realised that someones IV medication was given at the wrong rate...
Or if I was in charge, that such and such a nurse fucked up and gave someone something they shouldn't have...
*sighs*
Oh well.. roll on holidays and Thailand.
Laters
Every day I sit here waiting
Everyday just seems so long
and now I've had enough of all the hating,
do we even care? its so unfair
Any day it'll all be over
Any day there's nothing new
and I'm just trying to find some hope to try and hold on to
and it starts again, it'll never end
I'm heavily broken, and I don't know what to do
Can't you see that I'm choking and I can't even move,
When there's nothing left to say, what can you do?
I'm heavily broken, and there's nothing I can do.
Almost given up on trying,
almost heading for the fall,
and now am I just screaming out I gotta keep on fighting
but then again it doesn't end
I'm heavily broken, and I don't know what to do
Can't you see that I'm choking and I can't even move,
well its hard for me to say, what can you do?
I'm heavily broken, and there's nothing I can do.
(Heavily broken, by the Veronicas)
7:41 AM
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Writing since January 2003!
web-counter? Maybe one day
BJ T now was S
Born in April on the 21st!
Australian but living in the USA.
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